GRIEF SUPPORT
LIGHTHOUSE CIRCLE
COHORT 6 begins this June!
An important part of our work at Dairyuji is supporting temple members during times of loss and grief. Japanese Zen Buddhism, in particular, places an emphasis on honoring one’s ancestors. As an extension of this work at the temple, we offer an online grief support community in English for anyone to join. Your grief is sacred and deserves to be tended to with compassion. Grief can be isolating, so our mission is hold space for people to grieve openly and honestly within a supportive community. You are not alone.
Two options for support:
LIGHTHOUSE CIRCLE is a support group that runs for six months twice a year. There are monthly group calls, engaging content and online community support.
Registration is currently open for 6th cohort beginning this June 2025! Monthly group meetings are held every third Tuesday evening & Thursday morning Japan Standard Time. First calls are Tuesday June 17th and Thursday June 19th, 2025. Cohort 6 runs from June to December with August off for summer vacation and Obon holidays. LEARN MORE HERE!
EVERGREEN is a self paced online program that you can join anytime. This is a private and safe space to tend to your grief in your own way, yet still feel supported.
Both Lighthouse Circle and Evergreen are structured to provide practical support that you can access anytime and anywhere, offering you a place to feel heard and seen in your grief.
—-
We navigate OUR GRIEF BY:
—-
Witnessing Grief
We listen to, witness and honor one another’s grief with respect and in solidarity. We never minimize, judge or give advice.
Resourcing and Taking Refuge
We explore ways to care for ourselves in the midst of terrible sorrow. When that feels beyond our abilities we rest and take refuge in places that provide unconditional support.
Dealing with Difficult Emotions
We practice how to be with our messy, scary and overwhelming feelings without judgement. We offer ourselves compassion and space to be with our grief honestly.
ADDRESSING Secondary Losses
We discuss different types of grief and the wide ranging implications of how grief is impacting various aspects of our lives.
Redefining Relationships
We connect to our ancestors in meaningful ways and recognize how living relationships change after a loss.
Integrating Grief
We acknowledge grief is an ongoing experience that is part of who we are now. We are whole-hearted humans living with loss.
—-
—-
ways WE tend to our grief:
—-
JOURNALING
Writing about our thoughts, feelings and experiences in an unfiltered way provides a release for emotions, allowing for reflection and insight.
Rituals
Rituals like setting up an alter, making our loved one’s favorite meal or creating art can be performed to honor loved ones, connect to the sacred and tap into a source of inner knowing.
Meditation
Mindfulness meditation helps ground us with kindness and build the capacity to feel our feelings without judgment.
Embodied Practice
Grief is held in our bodies. Simple movements, breathing exercises and self soothing techniques can be used to offer compassion and gratitude to ourselves.
Resources
Tapping into and sharing helpful resources available including books, podcasts and support groups.
Community
While your loss is deeply personal, please know that you are not alone in your grief. Community and connection are waiting for you here.
—-
—
Meet Your Guides for Lighthouse Circle and Evergreen
Gretchen Miura
Gretchen lives in northern Japan with her family and together with her husband she runs Dairyuji Zen temple. As a grief educator and meditation teacher, she is dedicated to making grief support and mindfulness accessible for everyone to nurture well-being and a sense of belonging. She loves leading workshops, classes and retreats. Her brother Chris died when she was five years old which deeply influenced her views on death and grief, ultimately guiding her to this calling. Drawing on many years of exploration, learning and unlearning, she is passionate about bringing elements of ritual, spirituality, creativity and mindfulness to create a supportive atmosphere in which people can grieve. You can read an interview with Gretchen about grief in Tokyo Weekender.
Sarah Furuya
Sarah lives by the sea South of Tokyo, near the sacred shores of Kamakura, and from there she runs her coaching business and Legends Podcast. The heart of her practice is the many ways to lead a life, and working with and telling people’s stories. She honors the influence of those passed and creates space and rituals for them and their presence in her coaching spaces. She is passionate about looking at the taboos and lost traditions around death, mourning and grief.
FAQ
Who is Lighthouse Circle and EVERGREEN for?
Lighthouse Circle and Evergreen are for anyone needing support as they grieve a loss. Grief is the natural, emotional response to a loss. We never judge, minimize or compare grief at Lighthouse Circle or Evergreen. Your grief is your grief. The grief you are experiencing is valid. You are safe here to honor and express that grief. There are many kinds of losses including the death of a loved one, friend, neighbor or co-worker, divorce, a relationship ending, job loss, pregnancy loss, death of a pet, loss of lifestyle due to injury or illness, caring for elderly parents, estrangement, anticipating a loss or the feeling of loss due to world events and more. Lighthouse Circle and Evergreen can also serve as a space to tend to older, unresolved grief or grief that has been passed down generationally. While much of the language reflects a physical death, please make any adjustments to fit your personal situation.
What is the difference between Lighthouse Circle and Evergreen?
LIGHTHOUSE CIRCLE is a 6 month grief support community that has monthly gatherings on zoom. The topics, categories and content are the same as Evergreen. We run Lighthouse Circle twice a year. Participation is limited to protect privacy and foster a sense of connection. EVERGREEN is entirely self paced. You can join anytime and will have unlimited access to content. There are no group meetings in Evergreen.
Workshops open to the public!
Dissolve Resentment
Sometimes the best we can do is laugh (or cry!) when someone says something stupid to us when we are grieving. Our society is largely grief illiterate, so often people say insensitive things simply due to their own discomfort or lack of understanding. Together we find ways to navigate these comments and care for our needs restoratively. Levity co-exists with sorrow.
This 90 minute workshop includes: intention setting, space for healthy venting, expressing and hearing what we would LOVE to have heard instead, learning about grief theory and much more.
Retreats for our members!
Retreat at Dairyuji
This retreat is open exclusively to members:
- Sleep at a Zen temple with a rich history.
- Enjoy beautiful gardens and stunning views.
- Eat seasonal, locally sourced food.
- Join meaningful grief workshops and rituals.
- Create an art mandala and practice forest bathing.
- Spend time in community feeling seen and heard.
Reflections from our members:
